The Parable of the Parking Pass

Sean and me at his induction ceremony at the National Guary Armory, Feb 11, 2010. A touching moment for Mom and son as he heads into the military.

So I need to post some great pictures. Thanks to Sean for capturing the moment. Mudge, as she is coming to be called--adds her personality to the household. It was touching to me, when I was feeling a little down last night, that Dad picked up Smudge when he was outside feeding animals, and brought her in to me to hold. Just a thought, but he recognized I would like to cuddle something warm, soft, and purry. Makes me understand that Doug does see when I am not doing good and that he picks up on my nuances. Thanks, Doug, just another reason to love you.

(Carol Orme's parking pass for downtown behind Church History Museum & Family History Library)

Which brings me to the title for this post. The parking pass incident. I had an opportunity to go downtown yesterday to meet my long time friend, Paula, who has moved here to Utah. We arranged to meet downtown to do a session in the Salt Lake Temple and go to lunch. I figured I would go early enough to do some research at the Family History Library as well. Peggy Leach my neighbor caught a ride with me downtown as well. We would do some work at the FHL , then I would leave and go over and meet Paula. To facilitate this, parking closeby behind the library, would keep me from walking very far (with this bad knee) and was availiable through Carol Orme's parking pass. She volunteers at the Art History museun and has her own parking pass. She has loaned it to us many times, as when she is not down there it is available for use. Well, we drove into the parking area, tried to get the gate to go up with the badge (it has worked before, sometimes a little slow, but it has worked)--it wouldn't open. I pushed the button for security to just buzz us in. When he responded with who are you? I knew I was in trouble. He proceeded to let me know that since I wasn't Carol Orme, why was I using her card, etc, and I was not allowed to park there and leave. I sheepishly backed out and went over and parked in the conference center. Since I was going to the temple I could get a parking pass--it was just further to walk. I was of course embarrassed and upset, what was the big deal anyway. there was plenty of parking there (a holiday) that was not going to be used, etc. Well, for the next several hours, the whole incident greatly bothered me. I was offended, hurt, and what not--and was basically ineffective in doing any research, as this thing totally absorbed my mind. I will add that I started praying for God to help me let it go. In telling this story, I realize that no one can totally appreciate what a state of mind I was in, but I am attempting to share this in way of maybe helping someone else with similar, not same, situations. It almost sounds too simple as I express it, but it was a big deal at the time. So--my time in the temple session was not that effective having this weight. I was pretty negative about now--with a bad attitude. But I kept praying for some help. About the last room (the Salt Lake Temple you move to different rooms)--I had a sacred experience. And as I said, I am only sharing this in way of passing this on as a benefit to others. I pictured the Savior talking to me, and instead of condemning me for being immature, stupid for holding on to something so inconsequencial, he was empathizing with me. I went over my feelings with him, describing how I felt. I described what I had gone through. He nodded his head, and told me He understood, and kept validating my thoughts and emotions. Then, he told me, that when I was ready He would assume the hurt--but only when I was ready. It was my choice when, it was not about scolding me, and telling me to let it go now, but whenever I was ready. About that time we had to leave, but I for the first time was at peace and relaxed. I could let it go when it was time. Gradually, not instantaneously, I found that the incident was gone from my mind--that there were no more emotions tied to it. We went to lunch, I did some more research at the library--and all with being at peace with life--happy again.

I was taught some more about the Saviour and how he is. It was of course humbling and amazing. The thing I was praying for had to go through this process. I learned more about validating people's feelings 1st, and so much more I guess too. It reminded me of the 2-piece swimsuit deal back when I was 16 yrs old. You all have heard it, because I keep bringing it up. (does that give you a clue?) My older sister, Tonna, in way of being my conscience took the 2-piece swimsuit and got rid of it unbeknownst to me. (The swimming suit was passed on to me by my older sister Carmen--Carmen always had such cute clothes--it was the only suit I owned and it actually looked nice. I really never had a nice swimsuit--money was the crux of the issue--you just never could afford things--and besides the swimsuit covered most of my body--really more than a 1 piece) So when Tonna took the swimsuit and disposed of it--I was mad. How dare she. The fact that my Dad didn't even make Tonna replace it, was even more reason to be offended. I was unjustly dealt with. So now, what has that got to do with the parking pass thing. I think that if Dad had validated my feelings, and allowed me my indignation over the deal, I would have let it all go. Because I would have known, he understood. And anyway, isn't that what all of us want--to be 1st understood, which makes us feel loved--and if that is taken care of, everything else doesn't matter in a way. We can let things go and move on.

I plan on doing a lot more validating--something I should have been doing more of all my life. It is what the Saviour does so well, ugh. And we learn how to do it from Him. Interesting that the Atonement really doesn't go into effect until we 1st allow it, and before we allow it we want to feel loved and understood. Just some thoughts to live by.